Lately, I just want to be alone and curl up with my thoughts and a good book. Blocking out the rest of the world and their problems. But in the same breath I would love for someone just to pick up the phone and ask me how I'm doing. I would probably fall apart in tears because I truly don't know how I am. I'm not happy nor sad...I feel like I'm just here. I feel like I've been fighting everyone and everything. Yelling at Greg for no reason, yelling at my computer at some of the idiots that I work (Not like they would actually hear me, but it helps), yelling at the idiot drivers. Are you seeing a pattern here? I can't tell you why I'm yelling so much, I just am. Greg says I have issues, which is true. But don't we all?
I have a girlfriend named Dawn, she is one of my best friends. But I don't think I could call her that anymore lately because the past 100 conversations, have turned out to be all about her and usually goes something like this...
Me: Hey, it's me... whatcha up to????
Dawn: Well. Blah.. blah...blah.. (and 30 more minutes of Blah, Blah and more Blah. Durning that time I say maybe 20 words)
Me: Call me back when you get time, got some things to talk to you about.
And of course no calls. E-mails from her are the same way. All about Dawn and a little about wondering how her friend is doing. What is so sad is, Dawn didn't even know about half the stuff that was going on with us trying to have a baby until 2 weeks ago. I told her over lunch, from that point she could see the pain on my face and understood for one freaking moment the world didn't revolve around her life's issues.
Thinking it's time for me to go make some new friends.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment