Losing Control

Today I cried...I cried A LOT! With all the running around for Alexis's shower and then having to get ready to host Thanksgiving and now having to get ready for Christmas...I just stood in the kitchen today and cried. I feel lost, like I don't have control of my life. I'm doing everything for everyone else and putting myself last... AGAIN! DAMN IT - how did I let this happen???????? I told Greg that all I want to do is disappear for a while. Which I know I can't do, but would be great if I could. So now that I've got that cry over with, I feel a little better. But I still feel lost and I don't know where to start to get control of my life again. Lex's Bachlorette party is Saturday in Atlantic City and I don't want to go. So add that to the list of crap that's bothering me. Along with dealing with this bug for the past week and a half now that comes and goes in waves. I'm just a lovely little mess.

How to a regain control of my life when everyone is pulling me in different directions? How do I say NO to people without feeling like crap and worrying about what they think of me for saying no. Why do I even care?

The Plan

Tonight we are having pizza. We will clean to prepare for all of our guests tomorrow. We are trying something new this year....we are cooking the Turkey tonight so the oven is free tomorrow for the rest of the dishes we need to prepare. Last year with all the food we prepared we really needed two ovens and two refrigerators. Our goal is not to have the stress we've had the past few years on Thanksgiving. Wish us luck!

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Can't be good

Looking out my window I see a truck called "Premiere Pest Services" at a house to the right of us in a different cluster of Townhouses then ours. Thinking if I was their neighbors I would be a bit concerned.

Blah Days

I've felt BLAH these past few days. Feeling like I'm fighting the beginnings of the flu...cold and achy. I guess all the running around for Alexis's Bridal Shower this weekend finally pushed me over my limits. Not in the mood to be social or want to talk to anyone. I'm REALLY not in the mood to work... but must. Thanksgiving is 2 days away and we have A LOT to get done for the dinner we are hosting. It will be nice to get everyone together and enjoy this time of the year. I must figure out how to shake this Blah feeling....Any suggestions????

Done being Nice

I am done being nice. I go out of my way to help everyone and make their lives easier and it's never enough. I end up getting screwed and shit on no matter what I do. Today was the last straw, I'm DONE!

Thanks News Journal

While looking at my local news paper online this morning, I came acrossed this article. I would just like to thank my local news paper for making me feel like CRAP. I did not need to be reminded that many turkeys lives are about to be over. The lovely picture of the Turkeys that you added to this article didn't help! Now I will have these visions of their faces everytime I look at our turkey this year. So thanks again for making me feel like crap News Journal!!!

Fortune

Cleaning my office today I found this fortune...


"Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded."


I hope there is some truth to this!

Sigh

I hate the 6th day of the month and 31 is not my lucky number. Another no success this month. But am trying to stay positive.

My friend sent me a text message a few weeks back that said..."If I had money I'd send you flowers 2 let u know that I was thinking of u. Instead ur stuck getting this cheap txt. LOL. luv u!"

I called her and asked her what this was all about, she said it was because I do so much for everyone else and never get anything in return. When she said this, it hit me like a ton of bricks. She was right. But me being well ME...have never asked for anything from anyone, that's just the way that I am.

The fact that she recognized what was going on and took a moment to send me a note meant more to me then flowers. If felt good to finally have someone acknowledge me. I give "alligot" to everything in my life, and recently I've felt like why should I bother? Nobody else seems to care so why should I?

Sigh

Election Day 2008

Yes - it is finally here. I can only imagine I am not the only person happy to see the end of the political nightmare that has gone on for almost 2 years. Hoping that we have a decision this evening and there is no drama like in past elections. But this day leads me to ask a couple of questions....

Why is my polling place 2 miles away from me? When I have 3 polling places within walking distance (quarter of a mile to a half a mile away) from my home?
I found this odd when we went to breakfast this morning and then headed over to our polling place (the High School) to check out the line to see if I could vote and be done before my morning calls. The line was about 100 people deep so we decided to come back later. On our way back home we passed 3 other polling places that had very little line, if any. This got us wondering why we had to truck across town when we could go vote literally in our backyard.

What happens to all the signs?

For the candidates that lose, what do they do next?

Does President Bush start working with the President Elect on turning over the Presidents office over the next few months?

Will Sara Palin really give all her clothes to charity if she loses?

Wondering why in today's world that the color of the candidates skin is still an issue for many folks?